Monday, August 21, 2023

21 Months

21 months without my sweet Cosmo. I'm still struggling with walking in the City since my mugging. So, I either drive or Uber everywhere. I know I have to get back into my old rhythm. But, I'm admittedly scared. I've updated my mace and added a personal security alarm (The Birdie) to the things I'm carrying on a daily basis. 

Since my last post, I've turned a year older. 


I had planned a "staycation" so-to-speak with a few concerts, a trip to the museum, and my traditional architecture boat tour. Well, one of my concerts was postposed until next. year (I guess almost dying will do that to an artist - thanks, Madonna). I did get a chance to see Bruce and the boys. I've seen him a number of times, but this time felt different. Could have been the setting of Wrigley Field, could be his song selections (a few that have not been on the set list for decades), or maybe I just appreciated it more. Regardless, a fantastic time.


I also had a chance to see the Van Gogh exhibit at the Art Institute. A fantastic exhibit and always a fave spot of mine when I need perspective and to reset.


I then took my yearly architecture boat tour. This time, I chose the 90-minute tour and went quite a ways down the south branch of the river into Chinatown. On the way back, our docent spoke about the history of Chicago food and drink. She told us all about the history of Malort. Quite possibly, the worst liquor made. Well, a few of the boat riders thought it would be great to buy the entire boat a shot of Malort. As they say, when in Rome...you take a shot of Malort. 




It absolutely is the WORST liquor I've ever had. But, a Chicago institution (or folklore). 

Finally, I spent this weekend poolside watching the Chicago Air and Water Show (well, the air part of the show, or at least what I could see).




Later this week I'm headed to Guns 'N Roses at Wrigley. Keeping up with the summer tradition of living out my youth - or trying to get back to my youth - or something like it. I'm a sucker for a good 80's hairband (my expectations are low, but I anticipate having a great time anyway).






Sunday, July 23, 2023

20 Months

20 months to the day that Cosmo crossed the rainbow bridge, I was mugged on the streets of Chicago. I was in my own neighborhood, just a few blocks from home. I fought and ran after him even after the fact. This happened on a busy street and me screaming to stop him and the words help prompted not one person to help me. When I could no longer keep up (lost sight of him after a block and a half), I stopped and quickly realized all that was taken from me. The absolute worst part was my Mom was on the phone with me when it happened and she could hear me screaming the entire time - helpless to help me. 

There were a few lessons I've learned from this situation:

  • You must call 911 in order to get your ID early replaced. And yes, to file an insurance claim.
  • The cops in the city of Chicago - no matter how many of them are on the same street where this crime occurred, cannot help you because, as the 911 operator told me, have no idea why they are there.
  • Always have a second phone. If I didn't have one I would not have been able to start the process of cancelling all my financial stuff and recovering my ID, etc. as quickly as I could
  • You think you know exactly what you'll do in this situation when it happens to you, and now I know you will forget all of that as it is happening. 
  • No matter how secure you think your belongings are, if they want them, they will find. way to take them.
  • You'll still be shaking the next day (and won't get much sleep)
  • You'll avoid the area for fear it may happen again.
  • You won't walk - even to work - afraid it will happen again.
  • You'll feel guilty that you're being dramatic when all that was taken was your purse, wallet, phone #1, $150 in cash, hairbrush, house keys, hand sanitizer, lotion, sunglasses, and an extra mask. 
  • Your faith in humanity will be tested.
I always thought if Cosmo was with me or I was on the phone (through my ear buds) that no one would approach me. I was wrong. 

Monday, July 3, 2023

Sweet 16

Yesterday would have been Cosmo's 16th birthday. I sure miss him. Here's my favorite Cosmo birthday picture.

Cosmo would have gotten a kick out of my celebrating his birthday at the inaugural NASCAR Chicago Street Race. I've never been to a NASCAR race, but it has been on my bucket list for quite some time. So, the race being a mile from home seemed like fate. I bought my tickets back in March and admit this is going to be the highlight of my summer. 

I got on the train early Saturday morning (to save my legs and feet as I. knew I'd be walking miles over the weekend). 


I came prepared. Or so I thought. I knew that rain was a possibility, so had my rain poncho. Had a small, clear wristlet packed with phones, extra chargers, hand wipes, masks, and sunscreen (which I applied before I left the house0. I also had my ear protection and sunglasses. 

I arrived at Grant park and quickly realized we were going to have to go through a few checkpoints before I could cross the bridge to gain access to my seats. 




I had to walk about a mile to get to my area. I bought an upgraded ticket package which gave me access to a tent, food, drinks, and an opportunity to hear a former NASCAR champion, and current broadcaster, Dale Jarrett tell us his thoughts about the Chicago race and his career.



 I watched both the Xfinity qualifying, Cup practice, and Cup qualifying. 


Finally, the Xfinity race.


It was fun until lightning entered the area. From there, we had to evacuate the park. the race didn't finish and the winner was declared the following morning.

I was looking forward to Sunday morning, as I had.a call time to go on a pit road tour and have my picture taken. But, Mother Nature had other plans. Record rainfall cancelled that opportunity, the finish of the Xfinity Race, and delayed the Cup race. 

Sunday was miserable from a weather perspective.



We eventually got started. But at that point, I was wet (never dried out) and a bit chilled. But boy was it fun!







A Kiwi won the race, so it made it feel a bit more like an F1 race. 




Regardless, it was worth the miserable conditions to experience history for NASCAR. And you can't beat that skyline.

Wednesday, June 21, 2023

19 Months

 Today the MacDaddy and Grandma celebrate their 54 wedding anniversary. 


Cosmo sure did love to spend time with Grandma and Grandpa.







Saturday, June 3, 2023

That's What?

 It's been a crazy few months, finishing strong with a lumpectomy and subsequent R&R.I'll get to the punchline first: Benign.

My journey started in January with a routine Mammogram. I got called back, but wasn't surprised. I had my first Mammogram done when I was 30, after my doctor "felt something" at my yearly exam. That turned out to be "dense."


Fast forward to the call back. Two more Mammograms (12 pictures) and 2 Ultrasounds with the doctor saying, "I cannot rule out cancer."

Next up, a needle biopsy. For the girl afraid of needles, I survived pretty well. In fact, I couldn't even feel the numbing. 48 hours later, the results showed the "mass" or "tumor" (yes, it has been described a number of ways) was benign. 

However, I was told I was being automatically referred to the surgeon and was told they'd explain it to me. 10 days latter I entered the waiting room and was quickly humbled when I saw how many people were waiting to be seen or have treatment.

The surgeon - an old school, matter of fact guy who never used "medical" terms to explain my tumor, essentially told me the tumor was quite large. In fact, it was twice the size of where they get concerned. Additionally, but extremely rare, the biopsy could have been a false negative since they did not remove the entire structure. Could we leave it in and wait and see, yes. But over time, these tumors have been known to show a malignancy. So, it need to come out. Let's be clear, how can you even tell this is a tumor (what you are looking at is the permanent marker - or clip - they placed in my breast after the biopsy so if I were to have surgery, the marker would show the surgeon exactly where he needed to go). 


Two and a half weeks later, I was rolled into an operating room at 12;12 p.m. to remove the tumor (this after my first procedure to insert a wire to connect to the clip so the surgeon's job would be easier - this wss not comfortable and I did have something that resembled a wire hanger sticking out of my breast). 






45 minutes later, the surgeon called my friends to let them know that it all went well and the surgery was by the book (and since he had to initial me just to be double sure he was working on the correct breast). 

I remember looking up at the clock in record and it was 1:10 p.m. Once I stopped crying uncontrollably (guess that was my reaction to the anesthesia), I was able to have a few treat (water, tea, chips, and Oreos). My friends joined me and we left a little more than an hour later. We stopped to get some medicine at the pharmacy (narcotics- which I never ended up taking), got some lunch, and was home by 5 p.m.).


The best news is the pathology came back benign and will only need to have a annual mammogram from here on out.

So let this be a lesson for all of us. Make sure you do your annual check ups and tests. I had no symptoms. Felt nothing. And the only way I knew I had this was because of my Mammogram. 


Sunday, May 21, 2023

18 Months

It's been 18 months since I last held Cosmo in my arms. I really miss him.

So much has happened in the past 30 days.

I had to go back to Northwestern for a biopsy (more on that later).

I then got to see Kona's Mom (and EE). She retired from my team last year (can't believe it has almost been a year). Kona has been having seizures and his Mom is worried. 



And, Auntie Kristin came for a visit! Can you believe it? She has not been to Chicago since February 2020, when we saw the Lumineers in concert 2 weeks before lockdown. She came into town for the Natalie Merchant concert (this is the third time we have seen her in Chicago since 2014). We went shopping and I event got her to go out for dinner, albeit outdoor dining. 



Great concert. Great weekend.

Tuesday, May 2, 2023

17 Months

I can't believe time got away from me this past month, but it has. This picture popped up in my feed today. 7 years ago, I took this picture as Cosmo was laying by my side to help me feel better. I was probably having a migraine due to the change in temperature. 


I would have loved to come home to my little guy today. I needed him. I've been here twice in 2.5 weeks, culminating in a biopsy today (which results will not come back for a few days). 


I'm a tough girl with a whole lot of pain tolerance, but I won't lie. I'm concerned. And this may turn out to be nothing. But if it is, I'll cross that bridge when I get there knowing I have the greatest family and friends in the world, three of whom came to my appointment today knowing they couldn't be with me for the procedure. They just sat in the waiting room - a way to show me they were there for me. 

I spent the weekend reliving my college days. I met up with two of my college roommates and we checked out the old stomping ground. It was great to see them. Two people who knew me before "life" really happened. And two people who still see me as the Sarah they became friends with almost 30 years ago. 






I realized how far I've come in the 25 years since I was in college. I think this potato sums it up well: